The Good Wife, Me.

It has been just over 2 months since my husband and I got hitched. Most people say nothing changes once you get married, especially if you have been living together pre-marriage. Well I say after the I do, that is not true.

Since my transformation from fried Weiss to au natural Stever, I have stepped up my romantic game. Don't get me wrong, I have always been a fan of the institution of marriage and the idea of eternal commitment. But I became a die-hard fanatic of indefinite love the day I became a "wife."

According to Wikipedia, "A wife is a female partner in a marriage. The rights and obligations of the wife regarding her spouse(s) and others, and her status in the community and in law, varies between cultures and has varied over time." In our culture, and by culture, I mean what goes down at 630 1st Avenue, this means I am responsible for a few things:

1. When I buy new clothes, hide it for as long as possible and then introduce it as "this old thing" when husband asks so as to protect husband's anxiety about my spending problem (or as I like to think of it, my patriotic contribution in getting this economy back on track).

2. If husband says that I drink too much, use a red wine glass instead of a champagne flute for my prosecco so that I make less trips to the fridge for refills, thus making it seem like "less." Further, add a little splash of OJ to the bubbly goodness, after all who can argue the nutritional value of a daily dose of Vitamin C.

3. When husband is waiting for me to finish getting dressed and ready to go out, place small snacks out in front of the TV, i.e. pretzels, chips, any junk we ate as kids and a juice box if available, so that husband is quiet and content with no rushing comments until the whole maintenance process is complete. The more variety of snacks the better, so as to overwhelm the senses with colors and textures, and endless possibilities of flavor combinations.

4. Make husband's coffee in the morning. After brewing the Chock Full o' Nuts that was on sale that week, make it taste sweet and delicious by adding artificial sweetener and vanilla flavored Coffeemate with a sprinkle of cinnamon. NOTE: Make sure that it is truly cinnamon you are using out of the spice cabinet and NOT cayenne pepper. Husband drank two cups with cayenne pepper, complained, sipped again, complained, got sick, threw out the coffee thinking it had gone bad and left for work. I soon thereafter figured out my mistake. He will find out about that on this blog. Great.

5. Let husband vacuum the cat.

We will leave it to those 5 obligations for now, and as I continue my adventures in the wonderful world of wedded bliss, I promise to document all of my moments, good or bad, cinnamon or cayenne, so that I can learn from my own enlightening blog and be a better "good" wife, and so that I can continue to entertain all of my 5 followers. I will not disappoint.