My Hallmark Hero

You would think that now that I am a "wife" to a guy we should all give an award to for patience in the line of marriage, I would be over the "I need an obnoxious number of roses sent to my office on Valentine's Day to validate my love life and therefore my self esteem in front of my colleagues." But after a long morning of other women receiving flowers with balloons and bears, I found myself angrily eating a salad at my desk at 2pm in a fury because my husband had yet to send me anything red, pink or large for my desk.

Lets face it, I was jealous of the other girls. I was especially jealous of one particular girl who received two dozen roses with a special Valentine's edition Chanel lipstick tied to a bear's heart that read "sh*t b*tch you is fine." A little dirty talk, a little Chanel. Now THAT Valentine's gift should have been mine!

I am the kind of girl that tells my man, "don't worry about sending me flowers. I don't need them. I know you love me." But I am also the kind of girl that by 2pm is feeling like exploding with frustration that all I got today was a heart-shaped lollipop that I bought for myself at Duane Reade.

Just as I was about to email my dear husband and tell him of my disappointment and remind him that the phone number to 1800Flowers is 1-800-Flowers, my receptionist called me to tell me that I had a flower delivery downstairs. After skipping to the front desk with a smile, ripping open my package and plunging the two dozen long stemmed red roses into water, I "humbly" carried them and took the long way around the office to my desk, making sure to slow down any time I passed anyone with Valentine's Day goodies at their station, glancing over to make sure my roses were met with eyes of envy.

I sat down feeling giddy with joy and also a little silly. Who was I to want flowers so badly and why did I care so much? Am I THAT shallow? Aren't roses cliche for Valentine's Day and aren't I against all things cliche? And isn't love about the love and not the stuff that people give to show love? I pondered this thought while staring at my roses and wondering if I had been swallowed up by the mass V-Day hysteria, and given in to a Hallmark holiday that used to mean a lonely night home with Burritoville and my cat.

It seems that I am finally comfortable enough with myself to just admit the truth. My husband has given me the foundation of love and support that I need in order to come out with it once and for all. I need flowers on Valentine's Day. Red ones, roses, and two dozen is a great starting place. I am okay being one of the many today, and to be a bit of a Valentine's Day cliche, because today is the first February 14th that to someone, a very special someone, I am the only one and to him, I am FAR from cliche.